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Showing posts from March, 2012

Unfazed

My daughter is, thankfully, nothing like me when it comes to adjusting to new situations and surroundings.  I am excitable and anxious, loud and distracted.  I get worked up when faced with the unfamiliar or unexpected, and Hubbs has to constantly remind me to unclench my fists (a telltale sign of my rising stress levels).

Baby L, on the other hand, is even-tempered.  She doesn't allow much to affect her emotionally, and a recurrent adjective that others often use to describe her is "content." She spent a full morning and afternoon visiting her Pau Pau and Gong Gong yesterday, and dining out with her aunties and mom.  She slept...and soundly, at that.  When we picked up her cousin and he decided to wail at the top of his lungs, she continued to sleep, undisturbed by the piercing shrill cries coming from beside her.  When we put her into the loving arms of aunties and uncles she had never met, she smiled and played and settled and cooed.  Nothing seemed to faze her despi…

As Time Goes By

    As for man, his days are like grass;
        he flourishes like a flower of the field;
    for the wind passes over it, and it is gone,
        and its place knows it no more.
(Psalm 103:15-16 ESV)

Recently Baby L had the opportunity to meet her paternal great-grandparents, and will be meeting her other set of maternal "greats" in the very near future.  In my mind, it was a bittersweet experience - the coming together of those in the very late sunset of their lives and one whose days have just begun.  It was also bittersweet because, on the day that I went into labour, our Grampa suffered a stroke that was then followed by a succession of mini-strokes.  We weren't even sure Baby L would have the chance to meet him, so watching her in his arms was an answered prayer.   Coupled with his fading memory, we weren't hopeful that he would know who we were, but he did.  In fact, he could still remember us (and spoke excitedly about us) the next day when he was asked about his…

Little Joys

I love being a momma.  Despite the lack of proper sleep, the breastfeeding issues that never seem to end, the reduction of my "me" time and the new reality that doesn't allow for the same active social life as before, I cherish my little girl and my time with her (especially while she's still young and cuddly).  I now understand sacrificial love in a totally new way, and can appreciate why parents would so willingly give their lives for their children and are absolutely devastated if they outlive them.  I would throw my body in harm's way for my baby; heck, half the time I wrap my arms around her car seat during a ride, in anticipation that I might just have to do that!

Some of the best things about being a mom (aside from Baby Loquacious - obvious):
* hearing a random giggle escape her lips as she sleeps
* folding or hanging her cute little outfits knowing how adorable she will look when she wears them
* feeling her little hand resting on my breast as I nurse he…

Moving Along

So we are officially moving! We will sign our lease in the next couple of days but we were given the A-OK today.

Now is where things get tricky.

The last time I moved (interprovincially, no less) I was unemployed and had been preparing for the move for months.  It was an early fall move, and we had taken possession of our Van apartment two months prior to our actual moving date.  Inordinately costly? Yes, but the transition worked well because we could make a few trips into the city to do the paperwork prior to our physical relocation out here.  Also, I ended up with 2 months of lead time to get addresses changed and all that jazz.  I had friends and family assisting with the packing and labeling and so everything worked out quite seamlessly.

Juxtapose that with THIS move.  I'm a F/T momma with a fussy little Baby L.  We weren't planning to move until the summer so this is sort of spontaneously unexpected.  A spring move means unpredictable weather, and we are taking possessi…

Slinging

Not a typo.  I mean slinging, as in using-a-sling.  My mom used to carry us around with one of the Asian ones that look like a square patch of fabric with four really long ties extending from the corners.  I remember wondering how her breasts and back didn't hurt given the way that those long, unforgiving strands of fabric were oft-tied to her chest, around her breasts while dangling my bro from her back by a scant piece of cotton.

Fast forward XX years, and now I am trying to figure out ways to carry my little one around without suffocating her or exhausting my arms.  Enter the modern-day slings.  There are many kinds, more than I realized until I googled it and talked to other mommas.  There are ring slings, pocket slings, bag slings, Asian slings, and backpack-style slings (the kind we're mostly familiar with because of the brand Baby Bjorn).

I have to say, IMHO none of these are fit for newborns (no matter what they say or what you might tell me to the contrary).  The clos…

Not Normal

Hubbs and I have been struggling to get enough sleep, to find time to shower, to do *anything* but baby-caring and his work-related duties.  Even after a month, we're not any better at managing our responsibilities as Mommy and Daddy as we were during our first week; we still have yet to get sufficient rest and resume "normal" activities like going to church and attending social events.  We've also had a hard time coping with our seemingly-unrelenting fatigue and not taking things out on the other person.  In fact, sometimes it takes everything we have just to avoid sniping at each other during those wee hours of the night/morning.

Surely this is not how parenthood should be, is it?  I look at the other new parents I know and observe the glow on their faces, the lack of dark circles, the affectionate gazes at one another, and also their ability to effortlessly incorporate their newborn into their lives and pick up where they left off.  These are people with jobs, ot…

A Prayer for the Mommas and Babes

It occurred to me today, as I sat in a frothy tub of warm, eucalpytus-spearmint-scented bubbles, that my bathroom and the one beside it had six outlets for clean water to dispense out of.  Six.  Two sink faucets, a tub tap, a shower head, and two toilets.  Even our toilets flush with clean water.

This realization pointed me to Jesus, and I had to thank Him for being so good to me, because I am no more deserving of clean water than a lot of mommies and babies in other parts of the world who don't get the same luxury.  I have been blessed, and it is a gift of God, through no works or merit of my own.

Then I began to think of the other mommas and babies.  The ones in parts of India, and China, and different countries in Africa, and other nations where poverty is the norm and "water" comes from a cesspool of dirty liquid used both by humans and animals for every imaginable task from drinking to draining waste.  It brought me to my knees in prayer for every single momma whos…

Operation: Pump It Out (and Find a New Doc)

It's amazing what even a little bit of positive feedback or affirmation can do for one's mood and energy levels.  This morning, Hubbs and I were sleepy, defeated, frustrated and slightly bitter about Boobfest 2012.  The fact that we had to further starve Baby L for two hours before going to the breastfeeding clinic didn't help, because we were also dealing with a frustrated, hungry, angry baby.  We pretty much survived the last 48 hours on prayer and by God's grace, and little more.

Backing up the train a little: yesterday, in a moment of desperate frustration, we had called our family doc to ask about pumping, and about giving baby just *one* "liberty" bottle during the evening to help her sleep, and if we could consider a gradual method of weaning baby off the bottle.  My doc wasn't pleased to hear from me on her day off (she had to be paged to call me) and told me essentially that she was doing me a favour by talking to me on her day off (even though …

Boobfest 2012

Like an actual festival...only, less fun.


Baby Loquacious has been on supplemental formula for the past month due to my previous low milk supply *and* the incompetence of my doc's locum underprescribing me the milk pills.  I didn't think much of it initially, since baby girl always nursed before she took the bottle.  However, in recent days Baby L's appetite has increased significantly (perhaps due to the switch from regular to lactose-free formula reducing the amount of bloat in her tummy), and her mommy milk-to-formula ratio has been getting out of hand.

At a month of age, apparently the supplement route is no longer a necessity (so says my doc), but more a choice.  So now I'm faced with a decision: do I continue to supplement and run the risk of eventually having baby rely mostly on formula, or do I return to a more militant breastfeed-only way of feeding so that I can make enough milk to nurse baby until I'm ready to wean her?  Obviously, as with most 21st cent…

Happy One Month, Baby L!

Hard to believe it but a full month has already passed since Baby Loquacious's arrival!  Much has happened in this time, and also very little (if that makes any sense).  The days following my dramatic labour and birth have sort of all blended into one another, with each day mirroring the one previous in terms of sleeplessness, multiple feedings, endless diaper changes and baby-adoring.

At the same time, I feel like time has flown by and Baby L has already grown and developed so much! Her height and weight have increased significantly; she can now fit into her Baby Bjorn seat without slipping through the leg hole, and her 0-3month sleepers now fit her such that both her legs can no longer fit themselves into one pant leg.  She has gained a hearty 2 pounds 3 ounces in just a month's time, and her height has leapt to a whopping 23.22" (97th percentile). 

Baby Loquacious is also becoming stronger with each passing day.  She wasn't exactly a delicate flower upon birth (h…

Spontaneity

I used to love spontaneity, like late night ice cream runs or impromptu day trips to Washington state.  Sometimes on a whim I'd decide I needed some retail therapy or a dinner out, and Hubbs and I would spend hours (sometimes a whole day) shopping and dining and running errands, with nary a care about schedules or time.  It was just him and I, on an adventure together and spending quality time with one another.

I miss those days.

My life as I know it has changed forever (not that I'm complaining, because my daughter is adorable and a joy in my life), and many of those spontaneous fun things are on an indefinite hiatus until Baby Loquacious is old enough for me to resume going "off schedule."  For now, however, we try to keep to a schedule so that we can get her internal clock set to learn the difference between night and day.

Of course, this means that I try to get some shut-eye when she sleeps.  It also means that my non-baby-times are spent invested in personal h…

Big Props

... to the following "must-haves" in our baby-fied household.

1. My Brest Friend nursing pillow (and its inflatable traveling counterpart)


I thought breastfeeding would be easy, given that like a bazillion women before me have done it effortlessly since Eve.  How wrong I am; it is a fine balance between proper latching and good positioning and sufficient supply and not-too-tired-and-cranky-baby-attitude.  In my case, throw in some tendonitis and Carpal Tunnel (one on each hand) for good measure, and you have yourself a case of the hards.  The first few days at the hossie, every time I'd go to breastfeed I would actually call in a nurse to help me with getting Baby Loquacious in position and latched; I took *full* advantage of having a nurse assigned to my room.  The next few days at home were hellish, when much of what I had practiced on the post-partum ward didn't work on my recliner or couch or bed or chairs.  I cried, baby cried; it was a mess.  Thankfully someone…

Jiggly Bits

It's currently 3:00 am.  I have been up since about 1:30ish.  My baby has been sleeping this *entire time.*  So what on earth is wrong with me? I should be sleeping.  Alas, no idea.  I can't sleep and am wide awake at this early hour.
 Actually, I do have an idea why I might be up.  My boobs were aching.  Nice, eh? But seriously, they were.  I first woke up to stroke baby's tummy because she was fussing in her sleep.  When she settled down, I realized I had to go pee.  After that, I noticed the ache in my chest when I tried to lay down again.  I got up to pump, which led to the assembling of newly-sterilized bottles, which led to FB updates and blog reading, and now I am wired and ready to go!

So now I am faced with a dilemma: Baby Loquacious is due to wake up in the next 30-45 minutes.  Do I try to get some shut-eye and risk being groggy for the next shift, or do I stay awake and ride this energy wave like nobody's business until after the shift is over?  To me, the …